Setbacks and Shortcomings

I have been MIA the past few days. We've been cheating. Cheating only ourselves, and the thought of it makes me sick. Over the weekend, we went to lunch and Ruby Tuesday, against our one restaurant visit per pay period rule. I don't feel so terrible about that, though, as we did both have the salad bar and made pretty healthy choices otherwise while there. We had water, and no soda. It could have been worse... That was what happened to us yesterday, when we totally let the lazy overtake us and we ended up at Moe's for dinner. $5 burritos, chips, and salsa is a heck of a deal when you're feeling like that pile of dishes in the sink is just too much to conquer after a long day at work or a day full of meetings. To add on to that, we also had cheese dip and for the first time since starting our 90 day challenge I drank my calories. I made excuses (the soda machine was out of both diet and zero coke and sprite) and just let it happen instead of switch to unsweetened tea, lemonade, or water. I was disappointed in myself to say the least. Even Erik woke up today feeling guilty. On the bright side of things, I did finally sign up for a gym membership. It's local to me, right outside of our neighborhood--less than a 5 minute drive!-- and they have a women only room, which was the real selling point for me. With my membership, I got a free consultation and fitness assessment with a personal trainer. While mostly, I could tell his goal was primarily selling me the service--which is extremely expensive and way outside of our current budget-- I do feel like he gave me some good basic information to get me started. He helped put my goals into perspective and we both agreed that in order to reach my goal weight, it would take me about 22 months (with the goal of losing 10 pounds per month and leaving some wriggle room for when I hit plateaus and when I exceed my goal). It made this challenge seem really doable and achievable, and I have never felt that was possible, which the exception of when I explored bariatric surgery as an option. I also, FINALLY, got a library card after living here for nearly a year and half. While I am an avid reader, my thought process behind this was to be able to get out fitness and nutrition books and workout videos. I got two yoga DVDs yesterday that I am looking forward to trying tonight. We did slip up, again, this evening by both having a 6 inch sub from Subway for dinner with our soup (leftover Medieval Times Tomato Bisque) but on the bright side we both reached all three of our personal goals for the first time since we started our 90 challenge. I'm feeling very motivated today. I'm hoping that the consultation I had today with the trainer really lit a fire under me and will keep me moving. 22 months! I can do that. I can commit to that. As fast as time flies by for me, that would be here in no time. Even if I don't reach my goal weight by then, I know I can make a huge change by then. I am a little nervous about how awkward visiting the gym may be after turning down the trainer services, but I can't let that derail me. All I can do is move forward and focus on positive outcomes these changes and challenges are sure to bring.